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Searching for God

by Teresa Lesher

In this inspirational memoir, Teresa Lesher shares her search for God. She explores factors that have made her who she is as well as influencers who shape who she aspires to be and who lead her in her quest for the Divine. She dissects basic concepts that have been essential for her understanding of God as well as paradigms that shape her experience of Him. She shares her journey along the Divine Path and closer to the Divine Presence through expressions of submission to Him. This quest for God takes her to her innermost self and ends with a discovery of life, an understanding of love, and a commitment to truth.

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“One of my earliest memories is of contemplating God. I was a freckle-faced girl of five, sitting quietly in catechism class when the teacher casually said, ‘God is bigger than everything.’ The words hit me like a blast force. The classroom disappeared, the teacher’s voice muted, and I gasped at the revelation. Bigger than the tallest tree in the yard? Bigger than a mountain? Bigger than the world? The enormity of God impressed me, but I couldn’t help wondering, ‘If He is bigger than anything, where is He?’”

In this inspirational memoir, Teresa Lesher shares her search for God. She explores factors that have made her who she is as well as influencers who shape who she aspires to be and who lead her in her quest for the Divine. She dissects basic concepts that have been essential for her understanding of God as well as paradigms that shape her experience of Him. She shares her journey along the Divine Path and closer to the Divine Presence through expressions of submission to Him. This quest for God takes her to her innermost self and ends with a discovery of life, an understanding of love, and a commitment to truth.

“Searching for God, Finding Love takes the reader on an intimate human journey. With wisdom learned from life and from the Quran, Lesher allows the reader to pause and reflect. The stories, poems, and essays in this book can be shared with Muslim friends and friends of other faiths. They bring us all together in the experience of loving God and remind us to slow down and pay attention to all the beauty we are given on our own paths. Pour yourself a pot of hot tea, add a drop of milk, and settle in to spend an afternoon with the author. She will become your friend, and help you to refocus and return to the path of Divine discovery.”

Dr. Tamara Gray
Executive Director & Chief Spirituality Officer – Rabata

“Searching for God, Finding Love is a profound account of the author's soul-searching spiritual journey and her providential encounter with Islam as a living religion. Each page is full of sincere and heartfelt discovery of God's Presence and a way of embodying this discovery in a Prophetically virtuous manner. The author, Dr. Teresa Lesher, who resides in Kuwait, has successfully distilled a meaningfully lived life through the practical wisdom of the Qur'an and the Sunnah of the Prophet Muhammad (s). There are many reflections that are quite engaging and relevant to the psycho-spiritual challenges that contemporary seekers of all faiths or wisdom traditions face. This inspiring life story is full of applied and beneficial knowledge for the seeker of truth interested in one of the world's fastest-growing religions. Highly recommended for those who are interested in a timely example of bridging the challenges and opportunities found in modern culture with the timeless values and spirit of Islam.”

Hasan Awan, M.D.,
Al-Qadiri-Shadhili, Founder of Hudur Institute

“In Searching for God, Finding Love, Dr. Teresa Lesher takes the reader on a fascinating journey inside her life as an American convert to Islam who has lived in Kuwait for more than 40 years. She shares profound, thought-provoking lessons she’s learned about life, love, Islam, culture, and God, amongst many other things. Written by a beautiful soul who has much wisdom to share and has generously done so in this unique memoir. This is a wonderful, must-read for anyone interested in the lived experience of Islam in the life of a practicing Muslim, navigating life within a cross-cultural context, making meaning out of life, cultivating inner peace and wellbeing, and developing a relationship with God."

Carrie M. York, PhD,
Founder and President of the Alkaram Institute. www.alkaraminstitute.org

“'Searching for God' not only offers an inspiring, emotional insight to the author's journey to and through Islam, it beautifully maps out Islamic principles in an understandable and relatable way. Truly a five star read!”

Ameena Blake, Muslim scholar, UK

“‘Searching for God, Finding Love’ by Teresa Lesher is a heartfelt reflection on her personal journey to Islam, filled with insights expressed with refreshing clarity. Teresa pens an invaluable narrative — an inspiring beacon for those on the path to discovering the beauty of Islam and the religion's unique quality of elevating the seemingly mundane to the sacred. "Searching for God" is a love letter written for all seekers but especially for those looking for a way to imbue meaning and purpose into every aspect of life.”

Sondos Kholaki,
Author of Musings of a Muslim Chaplain

“A story of a Christian who always carried Islam, unknowingly, in her heart until she finally discovered it, then artistically crafted her experience with a feather. Rarely does a book touch my heart and inspire me like that.”

Fadel Soliman,
Bridges' Translation of the Ten Qira'at of the Noble Quran

“Searching for God  is such a friendly read! The inspirational reflections shared in this memoir leads one to ponder deeply on how we are fellow travelers on this journey we call life.”

Marilu,
Founder of the Revert Channel,

“When I’ve participated in interfaith dialogue or worked with Muslim kids, I’ve found that their biggest interest can be summed up in the question, “What does it feel like to be a Muslim?”  And that’s a hard question to answer.   It’s about describing personal faith, not explaining the five pillars or all the other topics taught in typical Islamic school curricula.  Searching for God, Finding Love, with its short descriptive stories from the life of a Muslim woman, illustrates those deep feelings of growing in faith far better than I’ve ever been able to express myself.  I’m very grateful to the author for sharing her experiences.”

Norma Tarazi,
Author of Child in Islam and Practical Parenting for Muslims

“In the following pages, you are about to embark on a journey unlike any other—a journey through a life lived with remarkable zest and unyielding passion. This autobiography isn't just a chronicle of events; it's a living manual that vividly demonstrates how Islam is as much a lifestyle as it is a religion, offering a unique perspective on how faith can guide and enrich every aspect of life.Teresa, a modern-day adventurer with roots as deep and diverse as the cultures she's explored, invites you into a world many dare not venture. Her writing uncovers the uncharted territories of both the physical world and the human soul. Her story is a testament to living a fantastic life off the beaten path, where conventions are challenged and discoveries are plenty.At the heart of this book is a tale of love—a love for people, for culture, for the divine, and, most importantly, for life itself. Through Teresa's eyes, you'll witness the beauty and depth found within Islam for those who seek it.This autobiography is essential reading for anyone looking for guidance through life's complexities. It doesn't offer easy answers but shares wisdom from a life lived fully and fearlessly, reflecting the joys, challenges, and triumphs of a journey led by faith, curiosity, and unrelenting passion.As you turn these pages, prepare to be transported, inspired, and changed. This book is not just about a life lived, but also a guide on the art of living.”

Ronny Engen,
Norway, Entrepreneur and Philanthropist


I came upon a spring
Absolute grace, a peaceful place.
Its water granted life to me
Nourishing and cleansing me.
And you
Cannot really live
Without what it gives.
So come with me
Come with me.

And so I stood alone, abandoned, stripped of all my gods, lonely and longing for a true God, a worthy, absolute, ineffable god.  And I heard a gentle whisper, “Go back to your fallen gods and love them for My sake and in My service.  Hold hands and walk towards Me.  Come altogether in search of Me.”

 

An Arab man, his car having been rear-ended by another car, leapt out and rushed towards the other driver who sat stunned behind the steering wheel. He swung open her car door and exclaimed, "Are you alright?  I'm so worried about you!"

 

For years, as we drove through the peninsula, I marveled at the beauty and at the sacred history of the location.  I would be deep in thought, meditating on its significance, when suddenly I would spot an oasis in the distance, and immediately feel a jolt of confusion and distress.  There was something profound in the oasis with its simple people, something I couldn’t understand, something I couldn’t even express in the form of a question or problem. 

 

One of the most difficult questions “third-culture-kids” (TCKs) are asked is, “Where are you from?”  Most people automatically and confidently answer this benign question, but for a TCK, it is a conundrum.  So we would joke at home about how to answer the question:  just pick one culture that most closely resembles the one who asked; say I’m from everywhere and nowhere; say I’m from planet Earth; ask so how much time do you have?  We would laugh and let off steam but, eventually, the conversation turned serious. We had to come to terms with the question that would trouble us our entire lives.

 

Each of us can express our own individuality in unique lives that are full and meaningful and, at the same time, we can unite and cooperate with others to build mutually supportive and synergistic communities.  The result, like a mural of tessellating Islamic art, has infinite proportion and possibility.  

 

And so there you stand.  Behind you a fading memory, below you an abyss, before you a painful trek through fear, doubt, and exertion to a place whose promise is illusive.  And you have no choice but to go forward, one step at a time, to the unknown.

 

How does my perception of myself affect how people perceive me and relate to me?  What destiny have I made for myself and what power do I have to change it?  Who can I become?  And, more importantly, who do I want to become?  I was looking into a mirror, seeing myself but unsure if I knew the person looking back at me.